Dating an alcoholic liar
I’ve been systematically exposing my boyfriend’s lying ways over the last few months.I learned to do my research up front when something looked/seemed suspicious.Sadly, people who find this blog often type in the search phrase, 'why do alcoholics hurt us?', which results in an older post I wrote about why drinking is selfish.These strategies may not work for everyone, but hopefully they give people some options and ideas about how to cope with a compulsive liar.And if you have any successful strategies that have worked for you, please feel free to share them with us so that other people might benefit from your experience. Here’s how I tried to get my boyfriend to stop lying: It is possible to get a compulsive liar to change, but he’s going to have to be confronted over and over with the truth of his lying ways, and it’s going to be a long, systematic, and strategic process.He knows about what's going on in your life because he cares enough to ask. He's there, not just for happy hour, but he'll stand by if you get fired from your job. She is also the author of the comedic novel, FREE GIFT WITH PURCHASE. Pilossoph is a weekly business features reporter for the Pioneer Press, with the monthly column, "Heart of the North Shore." She lives in Chicago with her two kids.My therapist once said: “If you have family members who are alcoholics, you have no choice but to stand by them.
If you’re asking this question, you’ve likely experienced hundreds of their broken promises or engaged in zillions of crazy-making arguments with them over issues you’d thought resolved or so picky-yuny you can’t figure out why you’re talking (let alone arguing) about them!
The truth is that you will never come first, because even if we recover, we will have to put our spiritual health above all else.
But don't worry, because if an addict actually puts spiritual growth above all else, then our relationships and every other facet of our lives will end up in the best possible condition. We can't worship anything worldly or we will become sick and eventually relapse.
After my suspicions were confirmed, I’d ask him about what he said, giving him an opportunity to come clean.
Once he didn’t, I’d present the indisputable evidence. That was the only admission of guilt I would get, but I accepted it. So after I developed a pattern of confronting him with evidence, it became harder for him to automatically offer a lie as an explanation because there was a risk that I had done/would do more research to confirm the truth.